"Ablus Dumbledore got a scar that was a map of the London Underground; why can't I get useful scars like that?" Clint complains as Natasha stitches up where the bullet nicked his side, which is really barely a papercut despite the blood he's managed to get all over the safehouse bathroom and if he just keeps cracking jokes maybe Natasha will calm down.

"I can tattoo 'don't be an idiot' on your chest if that'll help," Natasha says sharply and Clint wisely shuts up. Even though she's wrong; taking a hit meant for her is far from the dumbest thing he's even done.