OK so this is in need of editing, but I wanted to get it in under the wire…


Pas de Deux


“Did you post that training schedule?”

Maria Hill’s eyes bore into Steve’s with a hardness bordering on diamond. He looks over at the bulletin board. Yes, he could have used Outlook, but dammit, there’s nothing wrong with using a corkboard, even if it marks him as a dinosaur.

“Yes, why?” he shrugs. “Something wrong with pen and paper? Less likely to be hacked, for one thing.”

She shakes her head impatiently.

“I don’t give a damn about that. You can use smoke signals for all I care. What I’m worried about is this.”

Hill stabs at the paper with a flawlessly manicured, but very short-trimmed fingernail.

14:00-15:30 Introduction to Tai Chi, with Barton & Romanoff, it says. Meditation, Self-Defense & Full-Body Exercise all rolled into one.

Steve doesn’t get it.

“Yes, so?” he says. “They volunteered. Clint says it’s a great way to get back into physical movement after lunch, and Nat…”

Hill gives him that Oh my sweet summer child… look that he always gets from people when they’re about to haul out a grisly tale about some huge, man-made disaster everyone knows about, but that he totally missed out on while under the ice.

“Yes, and Romanoff no doubt told you that they used to do this at SHIELD every Tuesday and Thursday and that it was hugely popular, including with the support staff.”

Since that is pretty much exactly what she’d said, Steve says nothing, just waits for the other shoe to drop.

“This is entirely true,” Maria continues, after clearing her throat. “However. SHIELD's HR figures showed that employee productivity actually went down ... significantly on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons. And that there was a direct correlation. You’ll see.”

“That makes no sense to me,” Steve interrupts her. “Productivity isn’t everything, even in HR world. This sounds like a great opportunity for team building. Plus, Clint and Nat definitely need to be doing something positive together after that unpleasantness in Leipzig. As far as I can see, all that’s a win-win.”

Hill shrugs.

“Fine,” she says. “Do what you want, and don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

*****

The first time Steve participates in the tai chi session, he finds himself drawn in by the way it seems to slow everything down – the sense of just being inside his own body, the moments of pure relaxation, punctuated by the sudden, cathartic release of air and adrenaline. The whole experience is quite exhilarating, actually, for something that doesn’t involve punching a sandbag as hard as you can.

It’s only towards the end of the session that Steve becomes aware of the numbers of people standing in the visitors’ gallery above the gym, watching the proceedings.

As for Barton and Romanoff, the instruction portion done, they are now floating into a warm-down pattern of their own, two black-clad bodies, bare arms glistening with sweat, moving in complete harmony. Eyes locked, they seem to be engaged in a silent conversation in which words are translated into movements, saying …

What, exactly?

The susurration of voices from the gallery increases in intensity, with fragments like “Man, you find it hot in here?” “God, I’ve missed that!” and “You doing anything later?” reaching Steve’s enhanced hearing. Nothing, however, that sounds even vaguely of insurrection or complaints to management.

He looks over at Hill. An unexpectedly attractive droplet of crystalline sweat is running off her temple, past her ear and down her very long neck into… She raises a questioning eyebrow at him.

“Well, that was pretty invigorating,” he says, straightening his t-shirt. “And people seemed to enjoy it. I don’t see what the problem is.”

Hill gives him a look that somewhat incongruously reminds Steve of Peggy, explaining the concept of the fondue.

“Do you know where your secretary is?” she asks, blandly.


*****

The next several sessions are much similar to the first, except that Steve is really beginning to enjoy the … certain glow that seems to linger afterwards.

Barton and Romanoff seem quite unconscious of the effect their very personal blend of grace and power seems to be having on those around him, and just head off to their respective quarters afterwards, side by side, Clint’s hand resting lightly on the small of Natasha’s back as they exchange one of their secretive smiles. He leans down and whispers something into her ear that makes her throw back her head and laugh.

The first thing Steve notices that these sessions are the single most popular thing in the compound, after the baklava made by Doreen, one of the more serendipitous of Hill’s SHIELD re-hires.

The second is that staff seems to be thin on the ground right afterwards. Accounting in particular turns into a wasteland, with only one or two people manning their cubicles.

Steve’s own secretary, Lillian, who doesn’t actively participate in the sessions but can be counted on to occupy a front seat in the visitors’ gallery, is a frequent absentee, for at least two hours after. She works hard and isn’t afraid of pulling overtime, so Steve doesn’t challenge her; he really doesn’t want to be that kind of boss. Even Wanda and Vision always seem to have something to do right after as well, so Steve has actually had to reschedule the Magic vs Repulsor Tech session to five o’clock.

The third thing that Steve notices is that despite her dire prognostication, Maria Hill is right there with him during the sessions, shaping the patterns into the air with the grace of a deer and occasionally casting a glance in his direction. He finds himself matching her movements, although no doubt his bulk is incapable of mirroring the fluidity of her motions.

But still… The sensation is something Steve is coming to look forward to, even after only a handful of sessions.

*****

It’s Friday afternoon and Barton and Romanoff are starting to do their private warm-down in the corner, absorbed in each other and seemingly oblivious to their audience (although Steve doesn’t doubt that both of them would turn into lethal buzz saws at the drop of a pin).

“They’re incredible, aren’t they?” Maria says intently, almost reverently. For a moment, Steve wonders whether this is the same woman who’d tried to talk him out of letting them run these sessions. “Carter used to describe what they’re doing as a form of tantric sex.”

They’re standing side by side, watching, and suddenly Steve becomes aware of something else he’s failed to notice until now. His nostrils flare a little as he breathes in what can only be described as … chemistry that permeates the air.
Maria watches him with a mixture of amusement and something else he can’t quite put his finger on, but certain parts of his anatomy are taking notice.

“Now do you see?” she says. Her voice is getting a little breathy and she seems to be standing a little closer than before.

Steve does. He may be almost a hundred years old, but he’s not dead.

"Productivity may be down," he says, "but what about morale and employee happiness? Did your HR people ever measure those?"

She purses her lips and slowly shakes her head - as close as Maria Hill will ever get to admitting defeat.

“It’s Friday afternoon,” he says, cupping her elbow with his hand and guiding her away from the not-so-private show at the other end of the gym. “Time for a drink?”




Edited 2021-03-01 03:57 am (UTC)

Bwahaha, I love this! This is not a problem I'd considered lol.

I'm so glad you filled this one, your SHIELD shenanigans always make me smile :D

Glad you liked this little piece of fluff I managed to blow in 3 hours before the deadline...

Edited version (including a minor clarification of the timeline)
now on A03

Omg this is hilarious and cute and SEXY and now the "T, alas" makes total sense. LOL!

Yeah, I didn't have time to go beyond the "suggestive" part, alas... :P